Many of these questions relate to partners but domestic abuse also happens between family members and ex-partners.
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- Do you feel nervous around your boyfriend, girlfriend, partner or family member?
- Do you have to be careful to control your behaviour to avoid their anger?
- Do you feel pressured by them to have sex or take part in sexual acts that you don’t want to?
- Are you scared of disagreeing with them?
- Do they criticise or humiliate you in front of other people?
- Are they always checking up on you or questioning you about what you do without them?
- Do they repeatedly and wrongly accuse you of seeing or flirting with other people?
- Do they tell you that if you changed they wouldn't abuse you?
- Does their jealousy stop you from seeing family or friends?
- Do they make you feel like you are wrong, stupid or inadequate?
- Have they ever scared you with violence or threatening behaviour?
- Do you often do things to please them, rather than to please yourself?
- Do they prevent you from going out or doing things you want to do?
- Do you feel that, with them, nothing you do is ever good enough?
- Do they say that they will kill or hurt themselves if you break up with them?
- Do they make excuses for their behaviour by saying it’s because of alcohol or drugs?
- Is it always your fault if they lose their temper?
- Do they deny the abuse happened or say that they were ‘just joking’?
You might have answered ‘yes’ to some of these questions, but still think ‘it’s not that bad’. But feeling scared, humiliated, pressured or controlled is not the way you should feel in a relationship. You should feel loved, respected, and free to be yourself. Your feelings and your safety are important.
It’s not your fault if you are being abused. You deserve to be treated with respect. If you answered yes to any of the questions, why not give us a call on our Helpline Number: 0800 4701 505 and talk to one of our trained members of staff.
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Need to talk?
For confidential advice, information and support, call our domestic abuse helpline on 0800 4701505.
Remember, always call 999 in an emergency.